Can good results be bad...?

Although this post is essentially about my daughter, excuse my self-indulgentce, for today I can't see past my own frustrations...

Today I feel a little shattered... I should probably be happy, but truthfully, I am feeling defeated.

Today we had a hearing test at the Cochlear Implant Clinic, I was looking forward to it, looking forward to some more answers, I guess the answers just weren't exactly what I expected...

I knew that I should not jump to conclusions as to Jaime's Cochlear eligibility, however all along the line we have been told that Jaime would be more than likely to receive at least one implant... possibly two... Today I felt that possibility slip further from our reach.
Testing today confirmed her best ear suffers a severe hearing loss; her worse ear, profound; Jaime responded well to the amplified sounds as they were played to her. If Jaime's responses remain positive, she may no longer be eligible for a Cochlear Implant, even in her completely deaf ear.
As I understand it, this is because as the brain deciphers the electrical impulses from the cochlear implant, this interferes with the brains ability to interpret the natural hearing signals from her remaining ear (not a desired result). This concept confuses me, as I feel that to rely simply on one ear with a severe hearing loss, would disadvantage Jaime in the long term. Perhaps I am mistaken, well, obviously I am; I always imagined that even if someone had one fully functioning ear, a cochlear could be of benefit to restore hearing to the other.


...But I should be happy, this means Jaime's responses have been positive, this means she is doing well...
I feel guilty that I want her to not do so well, however I wish that she may have the opportunity to receive a technology that will completely revolutionise her future.
After visiting Taralye last week and seeing the fabulous results for other cochlear recipients (even within weeks of implantation) I was excited... These other children, children just like my own daughter... they showed me what I could look forward to...


...Deep breath... believe it or not, I haven't been told that Jaime is not getting an implant, only that I need to consider the possibility that she may not.
...Funny... only a few months ago I was trying to get my head around the fact that Jaime may require an implant to hear, now I am trying to accept that she may not need one at all.

We return for further testing in April... I hope for some clarity...
Am I hoping for a good result? ...I am torn... Which one will have a better outcome?